Hopeful Because Jesus!

Karibu :)

Hello, and welcome to my page 😊

Is this your first time here? I bet it is, because it is my first time here as well. Maybe you should grab a cup of coffee/tea, and feel at home. In Kenya, your welcome is not complete without kachai. So its Wednesday September 19, 2018, at 23:00 as I am typing this. I am pretty nervous, excited and that other feeling that I don’t think has a name in our vocabulary, which happens in your stomach. I cannot really describe it, you just have to feel it yourself, or remember it then we can relate. And it is because I am typing my first blogpost ever! This is where I pause dramatically and do a happy dance, and then I remember why I have that “anonymous” gut feeling…. I am asking myself questions like, what if I put up my first post and I do not want to put up another? What if I am putting myself out there too much? Everybody now is a blogger or has a YouTube channel, I mean isn’t this cliché?

But then I remember something that my friend told me less than 12 hours ago (y’all should have a friend like her in your life). She says “Think about others, and what God will do in their lives, to channel His healing words to them that will read this.” So to you who has been procrastinating something that you feel in your heart you ought to be doing, I understand that the hardest thing is to start, because this is where I am now, but just start. Go ahead and try it out, because life is too short not to take every opportunity to add value and impact someone’s life.

Enough with the welcoming note now 😉  

This post is going to be more of what my story is, and why I am doing this blog. I am one person who believes in the “why?” for every decision, because I think it adds purpose and brings about passion and motivation to hold on especially when it becomes tough.

My name is Sylvia my friends call me Sly, but I have to say that it has nothing to do with my Character. It is just a short form of my name… and I am a Christian who believes in the saving Grace of God through faith. Besides that, I am an ordinary Kenyan Girl from a pretty ordinary family, with mom, dad and two brothers who I so love. What’s not ordinary, (Sorry for using this word repeatedly. It is so ordinary and annoying at the same time 😂😂) Is that I have been battling Chronic pain for about 8 years now, and goodness, it has been one bumpy ride. But I am here now, yaaay! Still fighting to stay strong, it’s a battle that probably never ends on this side of life, but I am hopeful (well most times).

Don’t feel sad, you see when I share this with people, I usually see their face change as they hear it. I can see their face drop literally, and the more I talk about it, the more they seem to get heartbroken. I totally understand, it is perfectly part of being human. I mean, imagine telling that to a dog, or a chicken, or a monkey; I mean even if you could speak “wolf! wolf!” or “quack! quack!” or even “whatever monkeys speak” …..They do not have the capacity to feel it like you probably do right now. See how true The Bible is when it says in Genesis 2:7 (ESV) that “then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature.” We cannot possibly have come from the same ancestors these animals did, right? We must have been made in His likeness, and that is why we feel things like He does, because Genesis 1:26(ESV) says ‘Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.”’

So yes, it is not the easiest situation. My almost everyday dilemma is to make a choice between Terrible widespread pain, and Horrible side effects of the medication that relieve symptoms. Oh, and the pain is just but one symptom. There are others, like Chronic fatigue, migraines, numbness, difficulty sleeping or sometimes too much sleep, mood swings, forgetfulness, sensitivity to light, noise and strong scents/smell and others that come and go I guess. I have basically learned the art of smiling through pain, and to say I am okay with a straight face knowing I am not, because otherwise I would stress everyone around me.  Actually, I saw this meme a few days ago that only I and others who live with Chronic pain Syndromes can laugh about ati “if I woke up in the morning and nothing hurt, I would think I was dead”.  Its not that bad by the way, but that meme had a lot of truth ☹.

I have also realized, that people know very little of what it is like to be in my skin. Very few people in this country and even world wide know about conditions Like Lupus, Fibromyalgia, Peripheral neuropathy, Sjogren’s and other “rare” ones that I have not listed. This includes people who live and interact with people who go through this daily. It helps when you understand even when you do not go through the same. Did I mention that most of these conditions are closely associated with depression? Oh yes, you read that right. In the wake of how much people are suffering depression and committing suicide in this day and age, this is a big one for people who go through these and other syndromes/diseases whose symptoms are debilitating or have no cure.

But don’t freak out… I am not dying or something. This is not a fatal problem, and it is not killing me slowly. As a matter of fact, the general prognosis is good, gets better with time, because you learn how to manage it and kind of get used to the symptoms. That’s pretty much it about what my story is, which brings me to why this blog…. The reason for excitement and the “yaaay!” I want to encourage someone, by sharing my journey; experiences from my past, present and future so stay tuned! 

I want to uplift someone’s spirits who feels they no longer find reason to live. I have had snippets of such moments and I have wallowed in self-pity many times and asked God questions, whether I did something to deserve such harsh punishment. But now I see a bigger picture, I have a hope that even the pain cannot take away from me. This is the problem that caused me to seek The Lord, and I found Him. I went looking for physical healing but I found healing for my heart and soul. I know that one day we shall be glorified, and there shall be no more pain or sorrow, and that is the day I look forward to. In the meantime, while I am here on earth may He enable me to accomplish that which He put me here on earth for.

Its done! 1311 words… My first post. Stay tuned for more. Ps. I am not going to be taking about this all the time. Sure, it will come up often as this unfolds, but I intend to talk about a lot of things including fooodd!!! Thank you for reading those few remarks, till next time, Turus!